Friday, July 8, 2016


1996 started really great! Sure, there was a dark undercurrent, but it came and left, returned and disappeared. It was a shadow that no one acknowledged. Max and I had the new baby Igor, and our family was really happy! We went to Europe in the summer and had our first family bus. It was like a dream we had, that came true. Wide eyed wonder. It made being a family easier, and working at the same time. School was on all fall, winter and spring, and the summer was the time to stay together.

In August, tragedy struck and we lost Dana. It was an overwhelming shock..a grief to our happy family. No where to run. No where to hide from it. This was worse than the shadow.

The Roots release was scheduled in my sudden tunnel-vision..Dana and demise were the demon on the left, the family was crammed in the middle, fighting for air, and the Roots release was on the right, in all it's tribal Metal glory. I knew every heartbeat of all three roads..Dana, our family and Roots. I had been at the birth of them all.

The tours rolled up under my feet, sweeping me away on a magic carpet. I was consoling the children, accepting the support of Max, and the loyal friends around me, and I was managing, all at once. Believe it or not, in my spare time, I began tracing my family history! It took the edge off the stress filled days. The first tour was with Ozzy and Sharon on board, so it really gave me strong shoulders to lean on. Those retched, first weeks were spent in their loving care. Sharon protected me and warned me several times on this tour, something was going on. Honestly, when you lose a child, many things in life take on a trivial quality. I was more overwhelmed by her good instinct and that the Osbournes gave love so freely to others.

A short jaunt through South America was next. Max had a surprise visit from one of the guys, in Buenos Aires. He appeared at our hotel room and began a rant that I am sure Max will never forget. It wasn't directed at me. It was to Max. It was falling down, at that instant. Max knew then, that the rumors were true.

We flew to Europe, for another tour, at the end of the year. By then, we both knew what was seriously coming. I think, that in Max's heart he thought it would go away. He never meant for it to happen, and tried to ignore it, hoping it was all a dream. For myself, I could see the finish line in the distance. It was December 16, the day I completed my contract. And it was coming right at us! Coincidentally, it was also the last show I had booked for the band...Brixton Academy, and it was sold out!

We flew the family out. My longtime friend, Kristen, accompanied them. I could trust her. I could have a loyal friend. She was someone I could suffer in silence with. She gives me strength. Max and I had a German friend, Jorg, who was also traveling with us. He was helping me keep my sanity on the European dates. He really helped to occupy Zyon and Igor when I worked. These 2 people shared my sorrow.

Shortly before Christmas, Sharon and Ozzy invited us to their home. We were so damn excited to see this much talked about house!! It was such a good time for us! Once, Sharon and I walked into Ozzy's gold award lounge and saw Richie and Jack puffing on cigars! Ozzy said "They will never smoke after this!" Sharon and I laughed and shared one of those "Oh what the hell!" looks! Richie smoked ever since!

Brixton loomed outside the bus, one morning. It was a brisk London day. The end of the year...a lifetime ahead... Little did I know that 24 hours later I would be trying to convince a Bobby not to arrest Max! But that's in Part 2....

Class dismissed........