After Dana's death, everyday human routines were a struggle for me. I could work because it took my mind off dark thoughts, but I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. How could I do these movements when my son couldn't? I felt guilty to sleep and relax or to feed my thin frame. It took me 3 years to begin to understand and come to grips with the tragedies of 1996.
The Deftones had a super tight relationship with Dana. They had a magical thread weaving them together for their love of music.
When they called and asked Max to come to Seattle and collaborate on a track in Dana's memory, it lifted Max and me out of the Valley of Despair. It gave us a spark of Life back.
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| Max, Terry Date, Myself |
We both flew to Seattle and hooked up with the guys and met Terry Date, who was producing Around The Fur. It was exciting to be with The Deftones. Everyone had so much positive energy. Being involved in a creation from the ground floor was like being an architect constructing his masterpiece. It wasn't long before they were all digging on some music Max had brought with him. I pulled a surprise out also. I grabbed some lyrics I had found at home that Dana had written. They were written across a flier and said "WALKING THROUGH THIS WORLD YOU HAVE TO HOLD YOUR HEAD UP HIGH".
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| Chi, Chino, Max |
Chino loved the lyrics and the 'Tones all loved the music Max brought to the studio.One thing lead to another and before I knew it, Chino and Max were throwing down the vocals. Chino even got a bloody nose from the mic hitting him. They were singing like it was a live show, not a studio recording! This moment was the twin birth of Headup and also the name of Max's new band. It was the recording of this song that inspired the name Soulfly.
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| Chi |
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| Frank |
Chino, Stef, Chi, Abe and Frank....Maximum Respect and love to you. You never knew, but you picked Max and me up and lifted us to the next stair, a stair that rose above our grief.
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| Max, Steph |
Dana's photo was pictured in the Around the Fur cd booklet. If you look closely, you will see a young, long-haired boy with a big birdie....little, mischievous Zyon....from his heartbeat on Chaos Ad, to Around the Fur. We were all survivors!
Class dismissed...